My Life as a Kung Fu Fighter

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Biological clocks are REAL.

I've come to determine that there are actual priorities to be met in life. While this old ticker is still shedding minutes away, there are many things that I'd rather PAY someone to do... when I can afford it.
- clean up dog puke. This is probably the #1 most disgusting task anyone should have to do. Especially when it's the dog's instinct to regurgitate on the rug. Then there's double the cleaning.
- iron. For real - when will wrinkles become socially acceptable?
- clean the tub. I will seriously clean 1,000 dirty toilets before I become interested in cleaning the tub. There are fancy tools and gadgets JUST so that you won't have to come near a toilet. For the tub? You have to SCRUB that sucker. A lot.
- make lunch for the next day. It's a daunting task that won't go away. We always need lunch, we can't afford to buy lunch, we have to transport the lunch, then there's the heating of the lunch. I'd rather drive home to eat than to have to bring my lunch to work.
- bring the dogs in from outside when it's 20 degrees out there. Taking the dogs out is not so bad. But when I have to stand in the freezing cold for an entire two minutes while I wipe their paws? No good. I'll someday have a doorman. Or live in a place where it's always above 70 degrees.
All of the above are wastes of time. Vacationing, gardening, ovulating, and blogging. These are important.


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